Maybe you’re the supporting character in a struggle, not the protagonist? (SSN)

Did you ever feel like the story wasn’t about you? That perhaps you were dealing with a struggle that didn’t really feel like it “belonged” to you?

Now, I still agree with Mike Dooley’s thought in “Manifesting Change” that:

“Nothing is by chance, nothing is random; there is always meaning, purpose, healing, and love.”

We can always learn and grow. But perhaps sometimes (maybe all the time) we need to remember that we are part of an interdependent species.

Sometimes we are here to be an antagonist, instead of a protagonist.

“The antagonist never sees himself as the opposing force, but as the protagonist in his own story. The same is true for the protagonist. One takes into consideration one’s own interest and not necessarily the other’s interest, whereas God sees the highest and best for all concerned… God expresses as interacting, interdependent entities. God is a system of wholeness. The integrated whole is producing, exchanging, and distributing all the time. Everything about God is inclusive and has good for us all.”
Science of Mind Magazine, June 2010, by Celestine Frazier

Or sometimes we might choose to deal with a struggle to help the greater good.

“Sometimes a soul will choose a particularly challenging lifetime in order to accelerate its spiritual progress, or as an act of love to help, guide and nourish others who are going through a similarly difficult lifetime. A hard life is not a punishment, but rather an opportunity.”
“Messages for the Masters,” Brian Weiss, M.D.

Or perhaps we have volunteered for a struggle to help another.

“Why might a life be chosen that could end abruptly in violence? Well, with nothing to lose, since we’re eternal beings, the answer must lie in either the adventure that life would give us or the adventure it would make possible for others. Perhaps we allow ourselves to live on a stage where we MIGHT be violated if it creates circumstances in which the perpetrator finally understands the grotesque folly of their ways, and at last begins healing. Or perhaps we allow ourselves to stray into harm’s way so that other’s might not ‘have to.’ Maybe we choose it to help others and ourselves to understand the mental anguish that often leads to, and comes from, violence. Or perhaps it would be for the shocking ‘wake-up call’ it would provide to witnesses and to those distantly aware of what happened, so that they might pay closer attention to their own thoughts, words, actions, and resulting consequences. The reasons, including for the love of all involved, are endless.”
“Manifesting Change” By Mike Dooley

Sometimes you just need to take a step back and contemplate that it might not be all about you. But since we are interdependent and part of all, everything ultimately is.

No matter what the struggle and why you are facing it though, you need to remember that you always have a choice. You can choose your actions to be actions in love and inclusion or you can choose your actions for ego.

This does not mean that you should allow yourself to become a victim!

When you are facing a struggle, you still need to take responsibility for it. You still need to Unscribble it to create the life you want. Don’t let yourself be taken advantage of. Use your integrity, communication skills, and problem solving abilities to work through any struggles you are facing. No matter who the protagonist in the story is, assume it is you (even if it might not be) and that you are in the struggle to learn and choose your conduct wisely. Choosing to be the protagonist allows you to take back control of your own destiny. Remember, we are interconnected, so the wiser you act, the better for the whole and the better for the true protagonist.

Also, finally, just because someone needs to learn a lesson (or you think they do, or think you might be playing a part in someone else’s big lesson), it does not mean that YOU are the one who has to teach it to them.

Do what you need to do to resolve the situation to your satisfaction, but don’t be the one who tries to teach someone. Lessons come, but learning is optional. If they want to learn, they will. If not, they won’t. YOU learn. YOU clarify how you want your life to be and how you are going to go about getting your dream life. Let others deal with their own lives.

We may not be on this earth to learn lessons. Or maybe we are. Who knows? But we are here. We might as well take the opportunity to experience and to grow. Growth often comes from struggles, so welcome the struggles. They are making you into something that is better than you were before, IF you allow them to. Learn from the frustration by finding solutions and exploring paths to get to them. Focus on the solution and the path instead of the problem. The other party will learn if they want to.

Takeaway: Sometimes you are playing a role in someone else’s drama. Even so, you still need to act like you are the main character and Unscribble yourself to the life you desire.

 

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Frustrations and Struggles are Here to Help (SSN)

Frustrations and struggles just help you to identify what you do not want. Once you start feeling frustrations, it is your opportunity to look at the opposite (what you do desire) and focus on that.

Here are some points to consider when thinking about frustrations:

1. Your frustrations are only obstacles in YOUR mind. You can move past them.

“Basic Principles of the Science of Mind” By Dr. Fredrick Bailes –
“This oneness of God and man is not hypothetical; it is actual. Man derives strength from his unified consciousness, unified with Infinite Right Action. When the personality becomes disintegrated, it is because that person see two things: that which he desires, which the Infinite also sees; and an obstructing power that can block him from the attainment of his desire, which the Infinite does not recognize. The psychologist uses the term “frustration” for this double vision, and it is well know that frustrated persons are always unhappy persons who may become neurotic or worse…

“In facing a weakness or any other problem, we have three possible courses to pursue. They are fight, flight, and Transcendence.”

The Infinite does not recognize the obstruction! The Universe knows that you can get past whatever perceived obstacle you are coming up with.

2. You are being given a gift in disguise.

“Illusions:The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah” by Richard Bach
“There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands. You seek problems because you need their gifts.”

Have you ever had something that you perceived as “bad” happen to you, only in hind-sight see how it was a blessing? Cancer survivors often say it was the best thing that ever happened to them. Perhaps you didn’t get that promotion, because there was a better job waiting for you.

You want. You want. You want. But your want is an attachment to a result. Stay open to new possibilities and learning experiences and you will find the gift in the frustration or struggle.

3. Frustrations and struggles are part of life. Get over it! Use them to help you, not hurt you.

Leo F. Buscaglia, Ph.D. in Personhood
“Fully functioning persons accept emotional pain as an inevitable reality of life. In fact they take it as an indispensable stimulus for change. This does not mean that they ask for pain or stand passively by waiting to be hurt. Rather, they understand that pain need not only mean discomfort but can also be utilized as a positive force for growth in humanness. A life without pain, if such a life were possible, would be but part of a life; for pain and joy are interrelated, at times dependent one upon the other, in certain circumstances growing from the other.

“The fully functioning person is aware that emotional pain is largely self-made. It does not arise, as we so often presume, from the actions of others, a negative situation or an unhappy occurrence. It is our personal reaction to these things. It is not others and other things which cause our unhappiness. It is ourselves. In a very real sense, we are directly responsible for our pain. We may either agonize over our human condition and curse our friends, family, society and God, whom we feel are responsible for it, or we may choose to accept it and do something constructive and personal to ameliorate it. One decision will continue to create useless pain, the other will bring solutions to it….

“Such is the case with mental pain. If each time we experienced it we would welcome it with interest and give it our immediate attention by asking ourselves, ‘What is this hurt about?’ ‘What is there for me to learn from it?’ ” What are my alternative responses besides suffering?’, we would perhaps discover the true reason for the pain and be able to arrive at some creative behavioral alternatives to aid ourselves in overcoming it.”

If you feel pain, it is just telling you to get back in alignment with your desires or showing you a new way to look at the world.

Use any signs of frustration and struggle are just emotional clues. Use them. Make adjustments and move forward without the frustrated feeling.

You often hear spiritual people saying that, “everything is perfect just as it is.” I don’t take this to mean that you should not work to make changes in your life, rather that the frustration you are feeling is perfect as it will give you a push in a new direction or to a new way of seeing the world. How brilliant is that? Everything is perfect, just as it is. In this moment you are receiving the experience you need to propel your life in a new direction. The direction from here is up to you.

Takeaway: Your frustrations are a part of life to be used as a tool.

Frustrations are only in your mind, as your interpretation of the situation. With the Universe’s capabilities there is always a way to fulfill your desires. Know that you can move past any frustration.

There is a gift of clarification or a new direction hidden in your frustration.